So Much Promise
by Vicious Enigma
Summary: Sometimes Willow forgets, they both lost someone. FluffAngst Oneshot.


Willow had been getting headaches, migraines, thick constant pain that clutched her neural cells in a vice grip and held on until she wanted to scream. These were not the kind of headaches to which she'd grown accustomed, not the steady healing ache of a spell gone wrong, those had always felt as if she'd been deprived of oxygen and her brain was working its way back. They were simple and human.

These were an affliction, like coals pressing against her temples, pain clinging around her ears and dancing up and down her brainstem. There was no magic for this, no magic without a target unless she was willing to numb the entirety of her body, which she'd considered. Then again, were there a spell she might not have used it, she was always trying to cut back with magic and always still using a little too much.

"You okay Will?"

She had been making herself tea, her hands unsteady, one clutching the sugar spoon while her other free palm pressed against her forehead in an attempt to keep her skull from bursting.

"Oh, hi Dawnie, uh, yep, a-okay, just a little headaches is all."

She feigned health, there was no need to worry them, Dawn least of all, with images of Dark Willow throwing a magic fit in her cortex. No need to give them another reason not to look her in the eye when she was trying to hard to convince them, to convince herself.

"I can help! I made a ginseng and chili tea once! Well, really, I accidently spilled the chili powder in the tea leaves but Tar-"

Dawn looked at her for a moment, unsure.

"Tara, Dawn it's okay."

When she continued her tone had lost its enthusiasm, "She didn't mind…I'm sorry Willow."

Dawn had made to make a move towards her but had been stripped of her resolve at the last second resulting in an awkward half-step. Willow felt her mind cool, pulses of pain quieting to a dull ache if only for a moment.

"Really, it's okay. You can say her name and I won't go all black-haired veiny-eyes on you. Uh, not that there's anything you _could _say that would make me, you know, go bad! I'm all peace and zen and stable girl now, er, but I wouldn't try to get me to you know." Willow made the sound effect of thunder by blowing air through her teeth; it was the closest noise equivalent to evil she could think of.

"You know you're still human."

"Hm, that's comforting, my friends find the need to remind me of my species."

Dawn rolled her eyes and hopped up onto the counter as Willow began to sip her sweet-smelling tea. The dull ache that inhabited her brain seemed to fall off further, ebbing into comfort around the edges; he eyes no longer felt as if they might pop.

"No, I mean, you'll make mistakes, you're bound to slip up once or twice. Everybody expects you to be completely perfect. But you're not perfect, you're Willow."

She thought for a second, "That came out wrong."

"It's okay, it's just that my slip-ups aren't fun chili in tea slip ups, or even musical demon slip ups, they're more of the end of the world variety."

"But coming back from…from _that_! How can they expect you to be perfect?"

Dawn was staring at her knees, Willow could feel her energy, the tumult and the sadness and the ability to heal. She could still feel that ancient energy that was the true Dawn tumbling out, wrapped in feeling. It was soothing in a strange way, the teenager continued.

"They don't get it, that it doesn't help, like yeah you almost destroyed the world and you've been all rehabilitated and stuff but that doesn't make it better, it doesn't make Tara…"

A few tears left dark wet circles on her jeans, Willow set her tea down and put a hand on Dawn's back, rubbing a soft slow circle through her sweatshirt, "It's okay, I know, trust me, if anyone knows."

Dawn lunged off the counter and into Willow, hugging her tight around the waist as she leaked onto her shoulder.

Willow was surprised for a moment, realizing in that touch that she couldn't remember the last she'd had such sincere human contact. Her friends had been treating her like she was ill, as if prolonged contact would cause them o catch the darkness they still saw in her. Dawn didn't mind. She smiled and hugged her back around the shoulders.

"I'm sorry Dawn, I should have been stronger for you."

"It was like losing both of you, like she was gone and then you were…"

"I know, I'm sorry, but I'm here now, I'm back and I'm not leaving you."

Dawn retracted her head, cheeks red and hot with grief, eyes swollen with salt and even through that she looked at her, really looked at her. When was it last that someone hadn't been afraid to do that, to look at her without fear of some corruption, without some shadow of gruesome memories.

"Promise?"

Willow smiled, the smile where her lips parted just a little as they stretched across her teeth and she leaned her forehead against Dawn's, feeling the last remnants of her pain obliterated in the contact. "So much promise, Dawnie, so much."


End file.
